“I Need You To Believe Me”

I had to apologize for something this weekend, and I HATE apologizing. Probably not much more than you do, but maybe a tiny bit more. I really, really enjoy being right. Getting to say the words “I told you so” (or even more satisfying, implying the words with tone and a sigh) fill my heart with immense glee. But you know what? I’m a jerk sometimes*, probably not much more than you, but maybe a tiny bit more. I spent the weekend in a cabin outside Yosemite with my little family. Valentine’s weekend. It was a lovely time, and aside from … Continue Reading »»

On Dad Discrimination and Equal Parenting

I would like to squash a stereotype with you today please. But first let me tell you a story. Last night, Joe got home from work at 6 p.m. Georgie greeted him at the door, excited to show him the new paints I bought her that morning. Joe ran to the bedroom to change out of his work clothes and into “play clothes,” and tried to sneak in a quick trip to the bathroom. Georgie would have none of this, and banged on the bathroom door, yelling at him to hurry up. She knows that when Dad gets home, it’s … Continue Reading »»

Vulnerability Vs. Over-sharing

I’ve learned the difference between vulnerability and over-sharing the hard way. I look back at my college years and shudder. My memory of those first few years in college were an over-sharing fest. Put a bunch of sheltered, horny Christians trying to navigate their first steps in adulthood in close-quartered dorms and mandatory weekly “spiritual formation” groups and it’s bound to happen. I guess. I think they called it community. Or maybe authenticity. I don’t know– there were a lot of buzzwords thrown around that I hardly remember. What I do remember getting way too emotionally intimate with people I … Continue Reading »»

To Those Who Don’t Go To Church

Yesterday, I took my family to church for the first time in a year. I sprung it on Joe and Georgie in the morning after I enjoyed my last bite of the crispy pancakes they made me for breakfast. “Alright, get dressed. It’s Mother’s Day and we are going to church,” I said. Joe looked confused, but not upset. He showered, put on a collared shirt, and dressed Georgie in this billowy teal dress she usually refuses to wear. I heard him negotiating with her while I was putting on mascara. She got a bag of fruit snacks out of … Continue Reading »»

My Husband is Not My Spiritual Leader

Here is a little timeline of my attitude toward the concept of husbands as spiritual leaders: Ten years ago: “I just really want a man who can be my spiritual leader. And I hope he plays the guitar.”  Eight years ago: “I broke up with him because I just can’t see him as my spiritual leader.”  Six years ago: “I’m marrying him because he is a wonderful spiritual leader.” Five years ago: “This marriage will never work if you don’t step up as my spiritual leader!” Four years ago: “This is all your fault. You were supposed to be my … Continue Reading »»